Lily's Birth Story

I had my last last prenatal appointment the Thursday before Lily was born. The midwife wasn't sure if she was breech or not and finally decided that she was head down. I wasn't so sure so I had a friend at DMU take me to the lab to do a quick ultrasound on that Saturday. We really had no idea what we were doing since we don't get any ultrasound training at school, but we could pretty much tell that the baby's skull was by my rib cage. So I called my midwife and told her the news. She wanted to get an ultrasound Monday morning and then go to the hospital to have a doctor flip the baby if it was breech. Well, Lily had different plans!! I just knew I was going to have her on the 18th, had a feeling all week, but I had hoped it would be after they flipped her! I woke up to my water breaking at 340 in the morning on Monday only a few hours before we could have flipped her! It felt like an egg was cracking inside me!! lol I had spencer grab some towels and I quickly waddled to the toilet. He called the midwife and she told us to head to Broadlawns hospital. It was a good thing I packed hospital bags just in case!! All we had to do was grab the bags, carseat, and some towels and we were off. I was kind of bewildered at the whole situation. I couldn't believe my water had broken!! Spencer had a blast driving I am sure, because he sped and ran through red lights once he saw it was clear :) He definitely had an excuse if a cop pulled us over! ;) We had never driven to Broadlawns before, but it was a quick 12 min drive from our house. We pulled into the ER and were surprised to see that we were the only ones there! My midwife had called the hospital to let them know we would be arriving so we were nicely greeted by the front desk lady. She took my insurance and I signed some papers while Spencer and I smiled at each other and realized we would be having a baby shortly!!! :) A nurse arrived at the ER to walk us down to the family birthing center. Again, we were the ONLY couple on the floor!! Best service ever!  They took me to a room and hooked me up to the monitors. I hadn't noticed any contractions yet. The baby's heart rate looked great, so I quickly asked to be taken off the monitor and declined an IV. They told me the family practice resident would be by in a few minutes to do an ultrasound and confirm that my water had broken. I thought it was pretty funny that they needed to check that, as it was still very much dripping!! ;) They came in and sure enough the baby was breech. So they pretty much told me my option was a c-section, but I could labor until the OB doctor came in at 7am to discuss our options. Once your water is broken you can't flip a breech baby.  After they left I started to cry, Spencer came over and held me and told me everything would be okay and that he was sorry she had to be born this way, but that she would be safe and that there was some reason she wanted to come today. He helped me come to terms with it.

First time being monitored. Excited to have a baby!!

We had called mom when we headed to the hospital to let her know what was happening.  Since we knew the baby would be born soon, we called her and told her to head on over. I was so glad she was there, just to have her there helped me feel better. I started noticing some contractions. The first hour or so they were very small. I was definitely starting to have to work through them around 7.  Dr. Hart came in around 730 am. I was surprised by how old he looked, but he was incredibly nice and an awesome doctor. He sat down on the bed with me and talked me through things. He knew I really wanted to have a vaginal birth but told me he wasn't comfortable with delivering one because it had been since the 80s that he had done one. I knew it was the safest option for both the baby and I and even though I knew I wouldn't get to birth her, I was ok with the decision to have a c-section. The doctor and the resident left and the nurse came in to put in the IV and catheter. I asked her to give us a minute and then asked Spencer to give me a blessing. It was very reassuring to have the blessing and it helped me to calm down and feel at peace. Though, I was still really anxious when they started to put in my IV. She missed the first time, tried again in the same arm which caused me to get a large hematoma so I snapped the tourniquet off and recommended she try the other arm! HAH She finally got it in the other arm. Then the nurse anesthetist came in and talked with me about how the epidural would go. After that a bunch of people came in and things really started to pick up, it felt really chaotic to me and I had trouble getting a hold of everything that was going on along with feeling contractions starting to be about every 3-5 mins apart. I felt like getting prepped for the c-section should have taken longer and I didn't really have a chance to mentally prepare for it.

I soon found myself getting up, I kissed mom goodbye and said see you soon to Spencer. I walked down the hall into the surgery room. This is when my shakes started. I am sure it was partially the nerves and the hormones, but I couldn't stop shaking. The nurse anesthetist started the epidural which hurt, but was very manageable. As the epidural took hold I started to calm down a little and then Spencer came in. They started prepping the surgical field. I remember I really wanted Spencer to come stroke my forehead because I was so scared, anxious, and excited at the same time. He read my mind and came right to my side and placed his hand on my forehead.  I took a breath and felt more at ease. It seemed like forever waiting to hear the baby scream! The nurse anesthetist was amazing, she was so sweet! She told me what was happening and reassured me. She was so calm that it helped me stay calm. She was really helpful. Finally, they started to pull the baby out of me. The nurse anesthetist reminded the doctor that we wanted Spencer to tell me if it was a girl or boy. I heard the baby cry and them call out 8:48am. That cry is a cry I will never forget and one that warms my heart whenever I hear Lily cry the same way as she did when she was born. Spencer had trouble seeing if it was a boy or girl so the nurse anesthetist whispered it in his ear as we were all laughing and crying. He turned and whispered in my ear that Baby Lily was here and then we both really started to cry as we finally knew that we had a baby girl. The doctors where wonderful and let me hold Lily on my chest as they closed my incision. She was so alert and so quiet all she did was look up at Spencer and I. I was so happy to have her with us!! I will always be thankful to the nurse anesthetist because she offered to take a picture of the three of us while they were closing me, I LOVE THAT PICTURE! Spencer took Lily to the nursery and held her on his chest for some skin to skin time while I was wheeled off to recovery.

One of my favorite pics from her birth!

Watch Lily be born!! Her legs were crazy from being breech! :) They have settled down now. 

Lily was born with brown/red hair (we couldn't believe she had any!! We were both bald), 7 lbs 12 oz, 20 inches long. She had already gained her birth weight back a few days after we left the hospital, She eats like a champ! :)

Recovery was one of the worst parts of the c-section. I couldn't stop shaking and I didn't have my baby with me and I was completely healthy but had to wait an hour to make sure I didn't have any bleeding. I had to wait in recovery by myself. I found out later Brandi kept asking if she could go in to see me and be with me, but they wouldn't let her. I thought it was extremely sweet of Brandi to want to be there with me. My pain started to get strong as the epidural was wearing off right before they took me back to my room. As they wheeled me into the room I could see mom, brandi, and spencer in the nursery. Spencer still had Lily on his chest :) They were all joking because Lily was sucking all over Spencer trying to nurse!! :) They all came in after me into our room. The next few hours are kind of a blur, I must have been drowsy from the pain and the meds. I remember holding her on my chest and her nursing, but I cant really remember how I felt about all of it. All I can really remember is the uncontrollable shaking that I had for about 4 hours after she was born. I was able to get my pain managed and the shakes stopped. Mom and Brandi stayed for a little bit and then headed out. That night we got to skype with Spencer's family to show them their first grandbaby! We also got to talk to the soon to be newlyweds, Spencer's brother Nate and his fiance Jennessa, before their big day. 

Spencer and I fell immediately in love with out little girl. We were so happy to have her finally with us. Spencer took right to being a dad! Because of the c-section I was bed bound for the first night. He changed all her diapers and brought her to me. He is such a wonderful dad! I never felt overwhelmed by the fact that I now was a mother. It felt so perfect and right to hold and care for her, it still feels that way. :) I love being Lily's mother. She is so sweet and looking into her eyes every morning when she wakes up warms my heart and puts a smile on my face, no matter how early it is or how tired I am. We stayed in the hospital for 3 days and 2 nights. The nursing staff and residents/doctors that cared for us were wonderful! I felt so bad for spencer, he had such a crappy fold out bed from a couch, but he loved being with us that he couldn't bear to leave to go sleep at home. I was very grateful to him for staying with us because I still had trouble getting in and out of bed. On the 2nd night the hospital had a special dinner made for us to celebrate Lily's arrival. I had steak, baked potato, a giant salad, grape juice, and a roll. Spencer had chicken alfredo, a salad, mt. dew AND a pepsi :), and a breadstick. We both had giant pieces of red velvet cake. They wheeled it into our room on a cart covered with a white table cloth. We felt so special! We loved it : )

Loved our special meal

Mom and Brandi visited everyday! Brandi brought the kiddos on the 2nd day. It was so fun to see their reactions to the new little baby. Grayson was so in awe by her :) Brandi also spoiled us with balloons and lots of decorations to celebrate that it was a GIRL! :) Spencer's work, On With Life, also sent us a balloon and pretty flowers and a plant. Brandi was so wonderful! While we were in the hospital she did our laundry and dishes and got the house ready for us to come home. It was so great!!!

I was feeling pretty good on the 3rd day. I dressed in street clothes and we put lily in her going home outfit :) Spencer had to take 4 trips to the car to load everything that we had accumulated!! Broadlawns gave us a huge basket of breastfeeding goodies and an adorable hat and booties for Lily. As we drove home, we both talked about how we couldn't believe she was finally here and that we were responsible for her. We were so excited!

Feeling great after a shower!

Going home outfit :) 

That night mom brought us homemade chicken noodle soup and breadsticks with apple crisp for dessert. She refuses to this day to think that the soup was good, but it was DELICIOUS! It hit the spot for sure!! And the apple crisp was amazing, as always!

The first week was pretty rough in the recovery department. It was hard to sit down and get up and to bend and twist. Spencer and mom helped me a ton with bringing Lily to me and with meals. My visiting teachers brought us two meals that week and we had friends bring us some meals also. I didn't have to cook for two weeks!! :)

Spencer snapped this of his girls when we were both sleeping :) 

Lily is now a month old. I cannot believe how quickly the time has gone. She is perfect, I could not have asked for a more beautiful, sweet baby girl. I love being her mother and I love the things that she has already taught me. I am definitely learning to put her first and to sacrifice things.  I hope that Spencer and I can be wonderful parents for her. I am very close to coming to terms with the c-section emotionally. Her actually birth was soooo different from the intimate and quiet birth we had planned for at the Birth Center. It broke my heart to not get to go through labor and pushing. I felt like something was missing from having her. Like I missed a rite of passage in to becoming a mother. At first I was very upset and felt so empty from not birthing her. As time has gone by and I have worked to see the positive and know that I am not any less of a woman or mother for having her via c-section it's gotten easier. I still get a little sad when I see my fellow pregnant moms have the births just like the one Spencer and I planned, but I am hopeful that Spencer and I will be able to have a baby the natural way the next time and now know that I am not any less of a mother because I had a c-section.